Today, something change in me, things that born after someone repeat an activity for certain time.

It’s start with money table, which constantly bothering me for past this week. The problem is the income that I earn are coming from niche thing, not politically continue to flow,  if I mean my self become overdevelop, yeah I know it’s still next 20 or 30 years ahead but who knows ?

The main reason of my thought is condition “of how if  I fall ?” and I can’t just calm down taking answer “relax dude, you just mind thing that not yet happen….”, but still, the question is “what if that happen ???”

The question became forked in two ways, and both ways continue to make another path, surrounds me, it’s like force to not believe thats moon was up there. Have you ever been believe in something but forced to not believe ?, so painful , pervade,  and sometimes forced to get used to it.